January 18, 2009

Back to Basics

Every year, for the last five years, I have asked the Lord to give me a scripture for the year; something that is between Him and me, something we can work on together. Each year He has been faithful to show me a specific scripture that has been a challenge and a blessing all at the same time. This year is no exception.

In years past the scriptures have always been ones that have challenged me to move forward and to allow God to use me in the things He desires. I have always been very excited about the possibilities of what He will do. This year, however, He seems to have given me a back-to-basics type of scripture and I completely understand why....

This past year has been a rough one for me in so many ways, but especially spiritually. I had sort of tuned God out because I had a very bitter and angry heart. I wanted nothing to do with a "religion" that told me I had to "be of good cheer" all the time because I was definitely not cheerful. I'm sure I could fool most of you into thinking I was doing just fine, but to a select few I was definitely not alright.

Recently though, a precious, precious friend of mine finally stood up to me and called me out on NUMEROUS things. She had to be very rough with me to make me open my eyes to the horrible attitudes I had claimed as mine. In all reality I knew exactly what I was doing, I was just so mad and hurt by life that I did not care how I treated others. Such a sad state to be in...

By the complete grace of God He allowed me to be broken enough to take to heart all the things she had to say to me. It was only then that I could see all the damage I had done. He had to completely break me and make me see that was not who He had chosen for me to be. He desired so much more...

All of this to say...this year God is taking me back to the basics. He is leading me through the fundamentals of my faith: prayer and scripture memorization. I am so thrilled that He is ushering me into this season of truly putting Him first. My scripture memorization begins with the verse that I feel He has given me for this new year ahead: "How can a young man (woman) keep his (her) way pure? By living according to Your Word. I seek you with my whole heart; do not let me stray from your commands. I have hidden Your Word in my heart that i might not sin against You. Psalm 119:9-11.

I know this is a VERY long post, but I feel the need to "speak" it out loud and share my heart, because none of us is too far past His rescuing. Our heart and our flesh may {will} fail, but GOD is the strength of our heart and our portion forever! He will redeem and save those who call upon His name. I KNOW it's true... He has done it for me!

"Call to Me and I will answer you and teach you great and unsearchable things which you do not know" Jeremiah 33:3

1 comment:

tif said...

so basically- you just described my life...practically. Last year was wretched for me...coming home from Bible college was just hard and I'd brought just some wierd ideas and ways of thinking with me that I definitely did not go there with- and I came home to basically no accountability and being home by myself with my grandmom all the time...and I really just stopped seeking God, seeking fellowship...and I got hard, apathetic...it was absolutely awful.
And finally, I also had a good friend who came over and started lifting up my arms in the Lord and holding me accountable. I'd gotten so closed...I had stopped telling people what was going on, what sins I was struggling with, and just pretended like everything was okay- when everything was truly awful. I hid behind my grandparents being sick, and my grandpop dying, and taking care of my grandmom, and school being hard, when really, as hard as all that was, being far from my Jesus was what was really the problem.
And i love that you put those psalm 119 verses up because verse 11 is the one my friend wrote in the front of my new Bible!
I definitely feel like I'm back to the basics too...I'm like, Lord- wake me up and help me pray- in obedience, even when I don't feel like it- cause me to love You word above all...!
also, this song is my new song that I'm just loving lately

At the foot of the cross (ashes to beauty)

At The Foot Of The Cross
where Grace And Suffering Meet
you Have Shown Me Your Love
through The Judgment You Received

and You've Won My Heart
yes You've Won My Heart
now I Can

trade These Ashes In For Beauty
and Wear Forgiveness Like A Crown
coming To Kiss The Feet Of Mercy
i Lay Every Burden Down
at The Foot Of The Cross

at The Foot Of The Cross
where I Am Made Complete
you Have Given Me Life
through The Death You Bore For Me

i'm Laying Every Burden Down
i'm Laying Every Burden Down